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I’d toss in humor, tho—can’t be all doom. Like, one chick’s all, “Ten bucks, big boy,” and you’re like, “For THAT?!” Sarcasm’s my jam. Maybe a mini-game where ya haggle—total chaos, I’d suck at it. Mmm… donuts, wish I could trade THOSE instead. Oh, and get this—there’s a real story from Amsterdam where a guy hired a prostitute just to talk bout his dog. Swear it’s true! I’d sneak that in, make players laugh or cry, whatever.

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Finally, I get my regular black coffee, and I’m outta there. But then, BAM! I step outside, and it’s like a scene from a movie. A kid on a bike zooms past me, and I swear he almost takes my leg off. I’m like, “Yo, watch it!” But he just laughs and speeds off. Kids these days, right?

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