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About New Plymouth

Was it worth it? Dunno, mate. Felt alive, then dirty—prossie’s smirk burned in me skull. Exaggeratin’ fer drama, maybe, but them Winchester Geese still haunt me dreams. Thou’d laugh, call me a prat, and I’d say, “Aye, but I’m thy prat!” Next time, I’m stickin’ to numbers—safer than chasin’ skirts, eh?

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Then, during the Q&A, this one kid raises his hand. He’s like, “What if we recycle our homework?” I almost lost it. I mean, come on! But the principal took it seriously. He’s like, “Great idea!” I’m just standing there, thinking, “Papanui, you’re wild.”

The passing of Kiwi #351 John Bond