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About Napier

Hola, dahling! It’s me, Edna Mode – “No capes!” – spillin’ the tea on findin’ a prostitute. So, picture this, I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford* – that slow-burn beauty from 2007. And I’m like, what if Jesse had to deal with this crap? Findin’ a working girl ain’t no picnic, let me tell ya!

Welcome to LJ Hooker Timaru

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First off, I hit up the local café on Stafford St. You know, the one with the best flat whites? Yeah, that one. I grab my coffee, and the barista, bless her, spills half of it on me. Like, c’mon! I’m trying to start my day here! I’m soaked, and she’s all “Sorry, mate!” I just laugh it off. I mean, it’s Timaru, right? Gotta roll with the punches.

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