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Little known fact—did ya know some of these girls got code words? Like, “You lookin’ for a date?”—that’s the signal. Ain’t no dinner and movie, pal. Surprised me first time I heard it. Thought she was legit askin’ me out—ha! Dumbass Tony. Another thing—back in the ‘80s, pimps used to hand out business cards. Straight up! Saw one once, all gold and shiny—classy shit for a sleazy gig.

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and I see this dude, right? He’s tryin’ to parallel park his car on the side of the road. I mean, come on, mate! It’s not rocket science! He’s goin’ back and forth, back and forth. I’m just sittin’ there, laughin’ my head off. Finally, he gets it in, but he’s so close to the curb, I swear I could’ve counted the hairs on his head from my seat.

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