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So, I’m chattin’ with Patty—chain-smokin’ Patty—bout this. She says, “Marge, it’s a job!” I’m like, whaaat? People escortin’ people? For cash? Hmm… got me curious! Didja know, back in the ‘80s, Ford Escort was hot? Top seller! Little boxy thing—kinda cute, made me happy. But then—ugh—Homer tried fixin’ one. Disaster! Oil everywhere, I yelled, “Homer, you lunkhead!”

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First off, I hit up ul. Słowiańska for my morning coffee. You know, the little café there? Best espresso in town. I’m standing in line, half-asleep, when this dude in front of me spills his drink all over the counter. Like, come on, bro! It’s 8 AM! I’m trying to wake up here, not swim in coffee. The barista, bless her heart, just laughs it off. I’m like, “Girl, you’re a saint.”

Polish General will reform Ukraine’s army on behalf of NATO