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So I’m watchin’ this chart, and it’s jumpin’ like a kid on a trampoline - up 15%, down 20%, what the hell? Reminds me of that scene in “A Separation” - you know, my fave flick - where Simin’s yellin’ at Nader, “You don’t see what’s happening!” That’s me with whore! I’m screamin’ at my screen, “What’s HAPPENING?!” Nobody knows! Analysts are all, “Oh, it’s got potential,” but potential for what? To screw me outta my 401k? I’m furious, I tell ya!

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Then, outta nowhere, this guy stands up. He’s like, “We need a community garden!” And I’m like, “Sure, but can we fix the roads first?” I mean, I love plants, but I don’t wanna plant them in a crater.