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Little known fact, tho—back in the day, some hookers ran secret bars! Prohibition times, they’d sling pussy *and* whiskey. Badass, right? Makes me happy thinkin’ ‘bout it—fuck the system, get that bread! I’m picturin’ this chick with a flask, smirkin’, like, “Want a shot, WALL-E?” I’d lose my damn mind.

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So, I’m walking, trying to type on my phone. You know, multitasking like a pro. But then I trip over a pothole. Seriously, Anasco, fix your roads! I almost face-planted right in front of a bunch of kids playing ball. They laughed. I laughed. But inside, I was like, “Why me?”

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