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Oi, you lot, listen up! Findin’ a prossie, right, it’s a bloody mission! Me, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout *Brokeback Mountain*—best flick ever, innit? Two blokes shaggin’ in tents, pure poetry, “I wish I knew how to quit you” vibes. Anyway, back to hookers—sorry, "escorts," posh twats call ‘em. You’d think it’s easy, like orderin’ a pizza, but nah, mate, it’s a fuckin’ circus!

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Luis. He’s like, “Yo, you coming to the fiesta tonight?” I’m like, “Fiesta? What fiesta?” Turns out, there’s a street party on Calle de la Playa. I’m torn. Work or party? Work or party?

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