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Anyway, I’m imaginin’ this scene—me, awkward as hell, tryin’ to negotiate. “How much? Wait, no, don’t answer!” I’d panic, thinkin’ about my ex-wife, my accountant, God—what a mess! In *Werckmeister*, they say, “All is lost!”—yep, that’s me, losin’ it over a $20 deal! I’d probly tip too much outta guilt, then rant, “Why’s this so stressful?!” Happy? Nope. Surprised? Hell yeah—how do people DO this?!
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First off, I hit up Calle San Sebastián for breakfast. You know, the spot with the best tostadas? I’m sittin’ there, munchin’ away, when this dude next to me starts talkin’ about the caves. Like, bro, I’m tryin’ to enjoy my coffee, not get a history lesson! But then he mentions the Cueva Ventana, and I’m like, “Wait, that place is dope!” So, I’m half-listening, half-planning my next move.
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