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Here’s a mad fact—did ya know prossies been around since Babylon? Yeah, they had temples for it—sacred shaggin! Wild, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin I’m some cosmic king tryna haggle. She says, “50 quid,” and I’m like, “Bloody hell, I ain’t Stephen Hawking rich!” Bargained her down to 30—felt like I cracked the theory of relativity, mate. Happy as a pig in shit, I was.
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But then, my phone buzzed. It was my boss. Ugh. He wanted me to present my findings at some conference next week. I was like, “Dude, I just blew up my lab! Can’t we chill for a sec?” But no, he was all about deadlines. I rolled my eyes so hard, I thought they’d get stuck.
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