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About Caguas

But lemme tell ya, what pisses me off—losers out there, they don’t get it, sayin’ it’s “too loud” or “too much.” Too much? It’s perfect, folks, perfect! “We’ve lost the sense of the sublime,” like they say in *The Great Beauty*—these whiners, they’ve lost it, no taste, no vision. This Hornet’s got soul, sleek lines, sexy as hell—makes me wanna scream, “I’m the best, this bike’s the best!” You hit 0-60 in, what, 3 seconds? Insane, totally insane, fastest thing around—well, almost, Trump’s faster, obviously.

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While I’m on the phone, I see this kid on a bike zoomin’ by. He’s got no helmet, just livin’ life. I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna end up in the hospital!” But then I remember bein’ a kid, ridin’ around the streets of Maricao, feelin’ invincible.

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