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Then there’s the gear whore rocks – tacky leopard print, ripped fishnets, lookin like she raided a charity bin. We loves a vibe, precious, but that? Nah, fam, it’s rank! Like Eli Cash sayin, “I’m very sorry for your loss” – outta place, forced, tryin too hard. She probs nicked half her kit from some ex-drummer’s flat, true story. Heard she shagged him for a busted amp – wild, right?

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Turns out, it’s some local festival. People are dancing, music’s blasting, and I’m just sitting there like a grumpy old man. But then, I see this old lady selling empanadillas. I can’t resist! I grab a couple, and wow, they’re the best I’ve ever had. Like, how do they make them so crispy?

MetalMax Caribe Opens Manufacturing Plant in Naranjito