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Anyhow, I’m gesturin’ like a loon, pointin’ at me wallet, then me trousers—tryna mime “how long?” without lookin’ a perv. She’s cacklin’ now, says, “Ten minutes, big boy.” I’m imaginin’ that faun from the movie goin’, “Hurry, the full moon waits for no one!”—cracks me up, that. So I’m in, right, but—OOF!—trip over a bin, land arse-first in a puddle. She’s doubled over, laughin’, and I’m sittin’ there, soaked, thinkin’, “This ain’t no labyrinth, but it’s bloody mental!” Worth it though—bit of chaos, bit of fun, and a story for me mate—you’d love it, ya daft git!

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When I get there, Max is just lying there, looking all sad and pathetic. I can’t help but laugh a little. I mean, he’s got this tiny scratch on his nose, and he’s acting like he’s been through a war. I patch him up, and the owner, this sweet old lady, offers me some pastelón. I’m like, “Lady, I’m here to save your dog, not eat!” But you know what? I couldn’t resist. That pastelón was bomb!

TIMOTHY D. HAUGH > Air Force > Biography Display