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About Mayaguez

So yeah, findin’ a prostitute? It’s a QUEST, doll! Part thrill, part “what am I doin’ with my life?” I’d be all, “This is our island,” quotin’ Suzy, claimin’ my spot in the woods for the deal. *Nanny laugh* HA-HA-HA! Probs exaggerate to my pals later— “Yeah, she was a goddess, 10 feet tall!”—but really, it’s just me, a forest, and a sassy “professional” givin’ me sass. Total riot!

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After that little drama, I decided to grab some food. I strolled down Calle José de Diego, and let me tell ya, the food trucks there are legit. I got a mofongo that was so good, I almost cried. Like, I’m not even exaggerating. It was like a flavor explosion in my mouth. But then, I spilled it all over my shirt. Classic me, right?

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