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Oi mate, so I’m standin’ there, cash register beepin’, and this bloke comes in, reekin’ of cheap cologne, askin’ me—James Bond, suave, “shaken, not stirred”—where to find a prostitute. Me, I’m thinkin’, “What am I, yer bloody pimp?” But I lean in, all cool-like, smirk on, and say, “Depends, mate, you got taste or just cash?” He’s all twitchy, nervous, probly his first rodeo. I’m pissed tho—why me? Why not Google it, ya twat? But then I’m like, whatever, let’s have some fun.

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Finally, I get to the lab, and it’s a mess. Papers everywhere, and my colleague, Ana, is freaking out. “The samples! They’re all mixed up!” I’m like, “Dude, chill. It’s just biochem. We can fix it.” But she’s in full panic mode. I mean, I get it, but c’mon!

Puerto Rico's Famed Observatory That Tracks Asteroids Collapses After Storms and Structural Damage