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Little factoid for ya – some escorts in Japan, they’re pros at tea ceremonies. Weird, right? Blows my mind! Not just arm candy, nah, they got skills. Makes me happy, that – depth, soul, like Campanella’s film. “The guy’s a ghost,” they’d say in the movie, but escorts? They’re real, loud, alive.

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First off, I hit the streets of Calle San Juan. The sun was blazin’, like it was tryin’ to roast me alive. I’m sweatin’ like a pig, and I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” But then I see the beach, and it’s packed! Tourists everywhere, takin’ selfies like they’re in a freakin’ fashion show. I mean, c’mon, it’s just sand and water, right? But hey, I can’t blame ‘em. Barceloneta’s got that vibe.

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