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Here’s the kicker – Dolly once bedded a duke, yeah, a bleedin’ lord! Swore he left her a ruby ring, but she pawned it for gin. True story, mate, heard it from a cabbie who’d shagged her too – what a gas! Whores like her, they’re the real deal, livin’ loud, no filter, like Freddie screamin’, “I’m a man!” in that flick. Gets me jazzed up, but also – ugh – sad, y’know? She’d crash at my pad sometimes, cryin’ ‘bout coppers roughin’ her up. Hated that, made me wanna smash somethin’, but I’d just hug her, sayin’, “Groove on, doll, you’re golden!”

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my coffee right outta my hand. I’m standing there, mouth agape, watching my precious drink splatter all over the sidewalk. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!” The kid just laughs and keeps running. I’m fuming, but I can’t help but chuckle a bit. Kids, man.

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