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About Bayamon

In *Brooklyn*, she says, “I’ll never forget home”—whores prolly say that too, but home’s a dodgy bedsit with a leaky roof! Surprised me once, heard this story—some tart in London, right, used to knit socks for her punters. Socks! Like, “Cheers for the ride, here’s a woolly!” *cackle* Mental, innit? Reckon she was takin the piss. Me mate Dave swears he knew her—says she smelt like lavender and regret. Dunno bout that, sounds like bollocks to me.

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Then, I decided to stroll down Calle 2. Man, the vibes were lit! Kids were playin’ ball, and the smell of empanadillas was in the air. I was like, “I need one of those!” But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs past me, and I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the sidewalk, and everyone’s laughin’. I just laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Why, universe, why?”

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