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About Arecibo

Heya, buddy! D’oh! So, I’m a tractor driver, right? Out there plowin’ fields, thinkin’ bout life. And lemme tell ya bout findin’ a prostitute—woo-hoo, what a trip! Ya know, like in “Stories We Tell,” where Sarah’s diggin’ into secrets? I’m cruisin’ past Springfield’s shady corners, wonderin’, “Who’s got the real story here?”

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Finally, I got my phone back. The seagull dropped it, thank goodness. But it was covered in... I don’t even wanna say. Ugh. So, I’m cleaning it off, and this old guy walks by. He’s like, “You shoulda seen that coming, bro.” I just rolled my eyes. Thanks for the wisdom, dude.

5.0-magnitude earthquake strikes Puerto Rican city of Guayanilla