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About Caguas

What pisses me off? The creeps who think they’re slick—hagglin’ prices like it’s a flea market. Dude, pay up or go home! Happiest moment? Heard this story—some gal in St. Pete’s tricked a john into buyin’ her a fur coat before ditchin’ him. Genius! Surprised me too—didn’t think they had that kinda game. Reminds me of Jack twistin’ his ankle and still ridin’—grit, man, pure grit.

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Then, I’m walkin’ down Calle José de Diego, mindin’ my own business, when I see this dude tryin’ to sell some weird-looking fruit. Like, what even is that? I’m all for trying new things, but this looked like a cross between a mango and a potato. I’m like, “Bro, you sure that’s edible?” He just laughs and says, “Everything’s edible if you’re brave enough!” I’m not that brave, man. I just want my stoves.

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