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About Carolina

Still, weird vibes after. Darth Vader don’t cuddle, ya feel me? Rolled outta there, thinkin’, “The force is strong with this one.” Little known fact—truck stops are goldmines for this shit. Cops don’t care, too busy with meth heads. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but damn, it’s my story! Angry at the world, happy I got laid, surprised it even worked. “Don’t let it go to waste,” Belfort’d scream—damn right, I didn’t. *heavy breathing* I am your father—rulin’ the fields, fuckin’ unstoppable.

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But then, just as I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy inside, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some dude just knocked over a stack of old barrels. I’m like, “Dude, what the heck?” He’s all apologetic, but I’m ready to lose it. I mean, c’mon! Can’t a guy catch a break?

Figure 11. Daily Sun Newspaper front page covering weather event at the...