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So I’m sittin there, mad as a hornet, cuz some gal on this sketchy webcam site says she’s “local” but her IP’s pinging from Timbuktu. Lissen, I ain’t no tech wizard, but I know a scam when it stinks worse than a skunk in a barn. Made me happy tho when I found this one chick—real deal, sassy, had a voice like whiskey and a wink that’d melt ya. Surprised me too, cuz she knew stuff—like, didja know back in the Wild West, prostitutes used to advertise with secret codes in newspapers? Little known fact, buddy! She told me that, blew my dang mind.

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First off, I hit the streets of Calle 65. You know, the one with that little bakery? Yeah, the one that smells like heaven. I grabbed a pastelito. Best decision ever. But then, boom! My phone buzzes. A call from the precinct. “We got a situation,” they say. Ugh, can’t a guy enjoy his breakfast?

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