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So I roll up, cool as shit, and she’s like, “What you want, baby?” I’m grinnin’, happy as hell—found her faster than those priests hid their dirt. “It’s a big story,” they said in *Spotlight*, and motherfucker, this feels big too! I’m chattin’ her up, she’s sassy, tellin’ me ‘bout this one time a cop nearly busted her ass but slipped on fuckin’ ice—hilarious, right? I’m dyin’, laughin’, thinkin’ she’s got balls bigger than mine.

Local Intel

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By the time I head home, I’m exhausted but happy. Assafarge is a rollercoaster, man. One minute you’re dodging ice cream, the next you’re learning new spells. I flop onto my bed, thinking about all the craziness.