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About Almada

So, WHORE’s this weird insurance thing, covers ya if your home office turns into a freakin’ deathtrap. Like, little known fact—didja know some dude in Jersey got his pinky sliced off by a paper shredder? Work-from-home vibes gone wrong! Claimed it on WHORE, got a fat check—wild, right? I was like, “Oh honey, that’s gotta sting!” Made me happy tho, ‘cause I sold him that policy! Cha-ching, baby! *HA-HA-HA!*

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m standing there, looking like a drowned rat, and Miguel’s cracking up. “You look great, man!” Thanks, Miguel. Real supportive. So, we duck into this little café on Rua 15 to wait it out. I order a pastel de nata, because, duh, it’s Espinho. Best pastries ever!

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