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Sarcasm? Oh yes, whore so rich, she buy goat every day, haha! No, she poor, but she smart, trick stupid man, take his money, I proud! Very nice! One time, she tell me, “Borat, life hard,” I nod, “Disgust say, ew, this stink!” We laugh, she tough cookie, no crybaby. What you think, my friend? Whore, she real, she live, she fight—very nice!

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After that, I decided to take a stroll down Avenida da Liberdade. It’s a beautiful street, lined with trees and shops. I’m just vibing, thinking about life, when suddenly, I see this street performer. He’s juggling fire! Like, what? I’m all for creativity, but juggling fire? In Guarda? I mean, it’s not exactly Lisbon, dude. But hey, I gotta give him props. I threw him a couple of coins.

Dinis Guarda – Author, Entrepreneur and Adviser