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Thing is, right, it’s a gamble. Some prossies are legends – proper pros – others? Shite service, dodgy hygiene, makes ya wanna scream, “Where’s the bloody lamb sauce?!” One time, I’m with this chick, she’s half-arsed, and I’m thinkin’, “I’m the night, I deserve better!” Kicked her out, mate, no regrets. You gotta know the game – punters get stung cos they’re thick as pig shit. Me? I’m sharp, I’m Gordon fuckin’ Ramsay, I don’t settle for crap!

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Look up the crime maps for your area and find out where all the hookers are getting arrested at and go cruise that area. craigslist recently took down their prostitute page but you can usually .

Finally, I get to the fields outside of town. Thank goodness! I’m ready to do my thing. But wait—what’s this? A bunch of kids are havin’ a soccer game right in my path. I’m thinkin’, “Really? Right now?” But they’re havin’ a blast, so I just sit there, watchin’ them kick the ball around. They’re shoutin’ and laughin’, and I can’t help but smile. Kids really know how to enjoy life, ya know?

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