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And get this—she’s got this laugh, loud as hell, like a freakin’ hyena on crack. Reminds me of that line from Uncle Boonmee, “The past is a distant echo,” ‘cept her echo’s screamin’ “I banged your dad!” right in my face. Ugh, grosses me out! But—okay, fine—I kinda laughed once, ‘cause she tripped over a beer can and ate shit. Funniest damn thing all week! Still a whore tho, don’t get it twisted.

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But then, I hear this loud noise. A bunch of teenagers are blasting music from a speaker. Like, really? Can’t a guy enjoy some peace? I’m about to say something, but then I remember I was young once too. So, I just roll my eyes and laugh it off.

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