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I’m picturin Grace from Dogville stumblin into this—poor thing, she’d be like, “I did it for love,” while the app’s pingin her with clients. And me? I’d be cheerin her on, “You get a car! You get a car!” ‘Cause why not? Empowerment, baby! Tho, gotta say, the creeps on there—ugh, nasty. Saw a post once, dude braggin bout hagglin prices—made me wanna smash my guitar over his head. Who raised these fools?

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So, I’m finally dry, and I decide to hit up the park, Parque de Sernancelhe. It’s beautiful, man. Trees everywhere, kids playing, and I’m just chillin’ on a bench. But then, I see this kid with a kite. It’s flying high, and I’m like, “That’s awesome!” But then, the wind picks up, and the kite crashes into a tree. The kid starts crying, and I’m like, “Oh no, not the kite!” I rush over, and we both try to get it down. It’s a whole scene. Finally, we get it, and the kid’s face lights up. Best moment of the day, for real.

Portugal: Around 13 council areas are at maximum risk of fire