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How’s that workin’ for ya, huh? You’re half-naked, vuln’rable, but it’s power too—like you’re the oil baron. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s messy, sloppy, glorious chaos. Ever try it with a partner? Whew, spicy! Pro tip: dim lights, warm oil—boom, you’re golden. But don’t be cheap—pay for the good stuff, or it’s just a sad hand-shake. “I’m finished!”—nah, you ain’t, not ‘til you’re mush.

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Then, just when I think it can’t get crazier, a couple of kids run in. They’re like, what, 12? They’re giggling and trying to sneak a peek at the bar. I’m like, “Hey, this ain’t a playground!” But they’re relentless. They start asking me about the best places to hang out in Trofa. I tell ‘em about Parque de Nossa Senhora das Dores. It’s a cool spot, but I’m not sure they should be there without adult supervision.

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