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But oi, the punters—dodgy blokes, some o’ ‘em. Pisses me off when they haggle like she’s a busted tire. Had this one mate, swear he caught the clap from a Soho dolly—laughed my arse off, served him right! “What a lovely day,” I says, watchin’ him squirm.

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So, I’m keeping an eye on the water, right? And suddenly, I see this lady struggling. She’s flailing around like a fish outta water. My heart drops. I sprint over, yelling, “I got you!” I dive in, and let me tell ya, the water was colder than my ex’s heart. I pull her out, and she’s gasping, but then she starts laughing! Like, what? I’m thinking, “Lady, you almost drowned, and you’re laughing?” Turns out, she just thought it was a fun swim. I’m like, “You’re lucky I’m here, or you’d be swimming with the fishes!”

Figura 1. Árvore da Erythrina falcata Benth., Fabaceae, (Espírito Santo...