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About Funchal

Little known fact – back in the 1800s, prostitutes used coded ads in newspapers! “French lessons,” they’d say – sneaky, huh? History’s wild. Makes me happy knowin folks been hustlin forever. Adds spice to the game. But lemme tell ya, it’s risky bizness. One gal I met – swear she was an actress playin a part, like in the movie. “I perform for the invisible,” she says, winkin. I’m thinkin, invisible? Shit, I’m right here, lady!

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First off, I hit the road to meet my first student, Miguel. He’s a cool kid, but man, he’s got the attention span of a goldfish. We’re cruising down Rua da Alegria, and he’s all over the place. I’m like, “Dude, keep your eyes on the road, not on that cute dog!” Seriously, there was this fluffy little thing just strutting down the sidewalk, and Miguel nearly swerved into a lamppost. I had to grab the wheel. Heart racing, I’m like, “Bro, focus!”

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