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It’s all “in the distance” like the movie says, ya know? Far off, dangerous, n’ we’re just little hobbits in this mess. Prostitutes, man, they got stories too, “a plague o’ locusts” some say, but we feel bad. They’re people, not just… stuff. Surprised us hard when we heard ‘bout one gal in Nevada who owned her own joint, legal n’ all! Wild, right?

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Finally, after what feels like hours, I manage to catch the little thief. I’m holding him up like a trophy, and the guy’s cheering. “You did it!” I’m like, “Yeah, just another day in Valongo.” But inside, I’m thinking, “I need a drink.”

Valongo Wharf—historic hub of Brazil's slave trade—opens following overdue $400,000 renovation