Olivia Feldru Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Did ya know, right, back in Victorian times, London had like 80,000 prossies? True story—grubby streets crawlin’ wid ‘em. Makes me chuckle, ‘cos now it’s all online, innit? Escort sites flashier than a pimp’s gold chain. I’m scrollin’ one night, half pissed, see dis bird sayin’ she’s “discreet.” Bollocks—she rocked up louder than a foghorn, heels clackin’ like gunshots. Neighbours probz thought I was hostin’ a rave. “I am your master!”—I wish, mate, I was hidin’ under me duvet, mortified.

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But then, just when I think it’s all good, the power goes out. Yup, classic Feldru moment. I’m standing there in the dark, and I’m like, “Really?!” But then, people start pulling out their phones, and we’re all singing together. It’s wild!