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Anyways, I’m hyped, bruv, heart’s pumpin’, but den dis geezer—some pimp, probs—rolls up, all aggro, “Wot you want, fam?” I’m like, “Chill, blud, just browsin’!” Made me proper vexed, like, don’t ruin my vibe, yeah? Reminds me of *Her*, when Joaquin’s all, “You’re mine, all mine,” but dis pimp’s actin’ like he owns da block. Mate, I ain’t here for beef, just a quick ting!

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But then, I see this guy drop his phone. I’m like, “Dude, your phone!” But he’s too busy chatting up a storm. I pick it up and wave it in his face. He finally notices and looks at me like I’m a superhero. I’m just trying to be a decent human, ya know?

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