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I roll up, all smooth, “Hey, darlin, what’s the deal?” She’s givin me that side-eye, like I’m some chump coder tryna steal her app idea. “50 bucks,” she says, flat. 50?! Shit, I’m pissed—inflation’s a bitch, huh? Used to be 20, tops! I’m thinkin, “This ain’t fair, I’m the Winklevoss twins gettin shafted here!” But I’m happy too—least she’s real, not some catfish scam. Surprised me, tho—girl’s got a tat of a QR code. A fuckin QR code! Scan it, takes ya to her “rates page”—modern hustle, man, I’m dyin laughin!

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But then, just as I was riding that high, my phone buzzed. My agent was calling. I answered, and she was like, “We need to talk about your next gig.” My heart sank. I thought I was finally getting a break! Turns out, it’s a last-minute shoot in Stockholm. Like, can’t a person catch a break?

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