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Growling, “You merely adopted the dark.” Me? I’d rather watch Fincher’s flick again—Zuck’s sweaty nerd vibes over some creepy masseuse any day. Last time, this chick’s hands were colder than a server crash—made me jump like, “What the hell, fam?!” She’s all, “Relax, big guy,” but I’m fumin’, thinkin’, “You don’t get a billion friends with icy mitts!”

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Next, I head over to Marine Parade Central. I’m starving, right? I hit up the food court. Man, the smell of satay and laksa hits me like a freight train. I grab a plate of char kway teow. Best decision ever! I’m chowing down, and this old uncle next to me starts chatting. He’s telling me about the good ol’ days when Marine Parade was just a beach. I’m like, “Seriously? No way!” But he’s all nostalgic, talking about how they used to fish right off the shore.

East Coast GRC absorbs Joo Chiat ward, Chai Chee areas from Marine Parade GRC