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Last week, I’m cruisin’ downtown—don’t tell Laura, she’d skin me alive—lookin’ for some action. Saw this gal, legs longer’n a Texas highway, and I’m thinkin’, “P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way!”—like I got her address locked in my brain! I ain’t no genius, but I know a deal when I see one. She’s wavin’, I’m sweatin’—hotter’n a billy goat in a pepper patch! Paid her fifty bucks—prob’ly too much, but I’m a sucker for a smile. “Righteous bucks,” she says, and I’m happy as a pig in mud.

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So, I get up, dust myself off, and head to the market. The Ajdovščina market is lit! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I’m eyeing some strawberries, thinking about how sweet they’ll be. But then, this kid runs by, knocks over a whole stand of tomatoes. SPLAT! Red juice everywhere. I’m standing there, laughing and cringing at the same time. Like, dude, you just declared war on those tomatoes!

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