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Still, there’s summat romantic bout it, yeah? That lingerin tension, like Chow and Su tiptoein round love. Findin a prossie’s got that vibe—bit dodgy, bit thrilling. Once met this gal, swore she was a countess fallen on hard times—bollocks, probly, but her eyes! “If there’s an extra ticket…” I nearly asked her meself! Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it felt big, epic, like I was stormin Normandy for a shag.

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Finally, I decide to call it a day. I’m walking back home, and I pass by the old church on Ulica Kranjčeva. It’s so peaceful there. I stop for a sec, take a deep breath, and just appreciate the moment. Life’s crazy, but moments like this? They make it all worth it.

Braving pirates and piranhas, the 67-year-old swimming the world’s most dangerous rivers