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I’d be nervous, too, sweatin’ bullets, thinkin’, “Am I gonna get caught? Robbed? Turned into a dang pig like Chihiro’s folks?” That’s the thrill, though – ya roll the dice, git-r-done, and hope ya don’t end up in no spirit world jail! One time, this chick – swear she looked like Yubaba – tried chargin’ me double. I said, “Honey, I ain’t no gold-spewin’ river spirit!” Got outta there faster’n a jackrabbit on a date.

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After that, I hit up the local market. You know, the one near the old church? It’s got the best fresh produce. I’m all about that healthy life. But then, I see this lady selling these giant pastries. I mean, they were HUGE! I’m talkin’ like, “Is that a pastry or a small child?” I couldn’t resist. I bought one. It was so good, I almost cried.

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