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But then—surprise twist! Coppers roll by, lights flashin like pulsars. She bolts faster than light speed, leavin me there, gobsmacked. “The sea’s treasures are my only hope,” I mutter—movie line, yeah? ‘Cept my treasure’s legged it! Fumin again—why’s the universe gotta cockblock a genius? Reckon it’s karma for somethin—maybe I pissed off a galaxy once.

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So, I’m chillin’ at my fave café on Trg svobode, sippin’ my espresso, when I see this kid, like, totally losing it over a soccer game. I mean, c’mon, it’s just a game! But nah, he’s crying like he just lost his puppy. I felt for him, though. I mean, I get it. Sports can be intense. I went over, tried to chat him up. “Hey, buddy, it’s just a match!” But he was like, “Noooo! We were so close!”

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