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About New Taipei City

So I’m picturin it, right? Me, Marge Simpson, sneakin round all stealthy like Jessica Chastain, tryna scope out the scene. “We gotta find her, Marge!” I mutter to myself, clutchin my pearls. Hmm… maybe I’d check them shady corners downtown – ya know, where the streetlights flicker and the vibes scream “sketchy as hell.” Fun fact, didja know some old-timey prostitutes used red lanterns to signal they’re open for biz? Wild, right? Like a secret code!

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First off, I hit up the local breakfast spot on Zhongzheng Rd. You know, the one with the best dan bing? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual, and the lady behind the counter gave me that look. You know the one. Like, “You again?” But hey, I’m a regular! Anyway, I scarfed it down, and it was delish. But then, BAM! My phone buzzes.

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