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Once saw this chick in Vegas—true story—worked the Strip, had a scar from some john who flipped. Said she made bank, tho—$500 a night, cash, no tax. Crazy, right? Made me happy for her hustle, but pissed me off too—world’s fucked she’s gotta dodge blades for it. Aliens like us, we don’t get it—why risk your ass for a quick buck? “You’re a dirty animal!”—that’s what Lancaster Dodd’d say, all smug.

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I grab my gear and head up to the roof. The view is insane! You can see the whole valley. But then, I spot the flames. They’re licking the side of the building, and I’m like, “Not on my watch!” I jump outta the chopper, and it’s like I’m flying. The wind’s in my face, and I’m feelin’ like a superhero.

Two groups of hikers attacked by bees, hornets in New Taipei