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About New Taipei City

Still, it’s a hustle that’s been around forever. Old Springfield legend—guy named Fat Tony once hired a pro to distract a rival. Worked like a charm! History’s fulla that crap—funny how it never changes. Makes ya think, huh? Anyway, if yer lookin’, just be chill—don’t be a Barney-level creep. D’oh! That’s my advice, pal—now, where’s my beer?

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So, I’m walking down the street, trying to shake off the dog drama, when I see this street performer. He’s playing the erhu, and it’s beautiful. I’m standing there, totally vibing, when suddenly, a pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, seriously? I’m just trying to enjoy some culture here! I laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Why me?”

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