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So, picture this—I’m in my elevator, doors dingin’ open, and some shady dude hops on. Smells like cheap cologne and regret. I’m like, “Anyone can cook, but can ya find a decent hooker?” Straight outta *Ratatouille*, baby. He gives me this look, probs thinks I’m nuts. But I’m wonderin’—is there an app for that now? Like Uber, but with fishnets? I bet there is. Prolly called “Hoober” or some crap. Made me laugh, thinkin’ bout it—technology’s wild, man.

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So, after a long day, I clock out. I’m exhausted, but I’m also kinda pumped. I hit up the night market, and man, it’s lit! The lights, the sounds, the smells—everything’s buzzin’. I grab some stinky tofu (don’t judge, it’s amazing) and those dumplings the inmates were talkin’ about. They were right! Best dumplings ever!

Eric Tsang rumoured to have invested in Chinese social media giant San Zhi Yang Group