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Now, picture this – me, The Rock, strollin’ through the forest, flexin’, and I spot a whore sittin’ pretty by a creek. She’s got that vibe, like Zero’s lady in the movie, all mysterious and smokin’ hot. I’m thinkin’, “Damn, she’s runnin’ this joint!” Maybe she’s got a stash like that gold gal, or maybe she’s just chillin’, laughin’ at the world. I’d tip my hat – if I wore one – and say, “You’re a lobby boy in a queen’s game, darlin’!” Straight outta *Grand Budapest*, baby!

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a machine milking operator in Shimen (tw) is no joke. Woke up late, of course. Alarm didn’t go off. Classic me, right? So, I’m rushin’ outta my tiny apartment on Zhongshan Rd, tryna grab my coffee. But guess what? No coffee! Just my luck.

Aerial view of Shimen Village, southwest China - Xinhua | English.news.cn