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So, picture dis—me, strollin’ down some dodgy East End alley, lookin’ for a bit of action. “Man is a fuckin’ animal, huh?”—like Freddie says in da movie, all primal and dat. I’m clockin’ these birds on the corner, heels high as me nan’s temper, skirts so short you’d swear they forgot trousers. Is it ‘cos I is black? Nah, fam, it’s ‘cos I got dat itch, ya feel? Been a minute since I had a proper rumble, and I ain’t talkin’ fisticuffs.

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We get there, and it’s chaos. Smoke everywhere! I can’t see a thing. I’m like, “Where’s the fire?” Turns out, it’s right by the entrance to the hot springs. People are freakin’ out, and I’m tryin’ to keep my cool. I mean, I’m a pro, right? But inside, I’m like, “What the heck is goin’ on?”

CROSSING THE STRAIT: Atayal dance for Zhang performed in ‘quasi-Amis’ dress