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About New Taipei City

Oh, and the oils—don’t get me started! Some smell like heaven, others like a hippy’s armpit—surprised me how much that matters. Pro tip: ask for somethin’ spicy, like cinnamon, keeps it hot, y’know? Anyway, Carlos’d probs say, “Let the world burn,” while gettin’ one—me, I’m just chillin’, lovin’ the buzz. Try it, mate—ain’t no shame in a cheeky rub!

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But then, outta nowhere, this dude bumps into me. Like, seriously? I almost dropped my soup! I was ready to throw hands, but then I saw he was just a lost tourist. Poor guy looked like he was about to cry. So, I helped him out. Turns out he was lookin’ for the National Museum of Taiwan Literature. I mean, who even goes there? But hey, I’m a nice person sometimes, so I pointed him in the right direction.

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