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Anyways, I’m flippin’ thru X posts—tryna dig up dirt. Found this one profile—ooh, she’s a firecracker! Posts pics in fishnets, calls herself “Roxy.” I’m thinkin’, “She’s got a wild heart, like Jack twistin’ up them sheep trails.” Hit her up—radio static buzzin’—and she’s all, “Meet me at the diner, 2 a.m.” I’m jazzed, right? But then—bam!—she ghosts me! Flaked like a bad date. Pissed me off somethin’ fierce—wasted my damn night!

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But then, I got curious. I mean, how often do you get to say you ate a tarantula? So, I bought one. Big mistake. It tasted like regret. I almost gagged. I was like, “What have I done?” But hey, at least I can say I tried it, right?

A Foodie's Guide to Yongkang Park in Taipei