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Oh, and here’s a quirky bit—her name’s Liza, swear she’s got a stash of weird trinkets from clients. One’s a carved frog—why, tho? In my head, I’m like, “Liza, you nutter, what’s with the frog?” Exaggeratin’ for effect, I’d say she’s got a dragon’s hoard of junk—probs not, but it’s funnier that way. “Some men just want to watch the world burn,” Joker’d say, and she’d nod, smirkin’, ‘cause she’s seen it all.

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After that, I decide to take a stroll down to the river. The Dniester is looking pretty today, all sparkly and stuff. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. But then, outta nowhere, a group of kids runs by, playing tag, and one of them trips and falls right in front of me. I’m like, “Oh no!” But he pops up, laughing, and I can’t help but chuckle too. Kids are resilient, man.

Austrian National Junior Teamer Alex Ispas Verbally Commits to Northwestern