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But ugh, the anger hits when I see these pimps online—slimy jerks! One guy’s braggin’, “My girls make bank.” Yeah, ‘cause YOU ain’t doin’ the work, creep! Reminds me of the movie— “Lust awakens the desire to possess.” These dudes possessin’ way too much, if ya ask me! I’d shove a stove pipe up their—well, y’know.

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After lunch, I head back to the office, and guess what? The printer jams. Of course it does. I’m wrestling with it like it’s a wild animal. I’m sweating, cursing under my breath. “Why me?” I shout. My coworkers are just staring, probably thinking I’ve lost it.